It was a dark and stormy night… OK, maybe it wasn’t. It was a warm evening in the Isle of Wight – we were on our residential trip. We had just come back from the sweatbath they call Ryde and I’d already had my shower.
We were just about to pig out on our sweet, play blackjacks (with Connect 4 counters, not money) and try to get our room’s TV to work.
‘What on earth is that?’ I thought as I ran into our bathroom to investigate the noise. I heard laughing from next door. Idiots. The walls in our hotel were so thin you could hear people from the opposite side of the floor.
I thought it would be a one off and jumped on my bed.
Cheap bunk beds – they rattle even more if you have a fidget bum above you. One of my friends, the fidget bum, was getting changed from his shower. Click, went the handle and I knew what next door were up to.
“Get down”, I shouted to my friend, like a sniper was scoping us. Too late, Alfie had already opened our door and he ran off laughing his head off.
We had already had a prank played on us today – George was hiding under our bunk bed. I was half expecting to see Josh in our wardrobe and Mason in our shower.
Anyway, this time, I wouldn’t let it off. I flung open the door and was about to give them a piece of my mind when the hotel manager came plodding up the stairs, probably due to the commotion next door. I had to think fast on my feet. We weren’t allowed out of our rooms after lights out – we weren’t in a prison by the way, if that’s what you’re thinking, even with a four by five metre room.
I wished the ground would swallow me up. I could pretend to be a statue or a burglar but they were bad ideas seeing as I was wearing Spurs PJs and I wasn’t still. I also didn’t want to look like a snitch, especially after my friend told me ‘Snitches get snitches’. That’s a nice thought, eh.
Instead of making myself look stupid, I just said to him “Next door are really irritating us and I think they opened our door”. See, a little lie doesn’t hurt. The manager just walked over to their door and knocked. The thing he said next made me almost spit out the sweet I was eating. He announced, “Any more of this malarkey and I will get a member of staff to stand by your door every night!” I tried not to laugh and walked like I was a really sensible chap back to my room who I shared with: a fidget bum, a psycho and a guy who makes his toy monkey jump off of the top bunk of the bed and get thrown around.
See, normal people. I was just about to fall asleep when Callum announced in a silly voice, “Fun Fact Number One, doors have door handles; Fun Fact Number Two, you can break your foot and Fun Fact Number Three, Frankie’s bed has railings”
‘This was going to be a long night’, I thought.